That Pervert Larry Craig

Kate published her article today on how the Star Tribune missed the fact that a United States senator was having sex with other men in the bathroom at the airport. I've got something to add. Stroke of bad luck #3: Reporters sit around. I'm glad we're paying these guys so much to come into the office every once and awhile to make a few phone calls and write up ten stories apiece on the state fair. No wonder Avista wants me to keep hacking away at our bloated labor costs.

And what in the world was going through Larry David's head? It's one thing to get a hot hooker if he's staying over night at the Graves or something. But having some dude give you a BJ in the airport bathroom is gross and wrong. That's something that is obviously going to come back and get you in the ass, if you know what I'm saying.

Did you see what he said, too? "I'm not gay, the people who I have sex with are." No, dude. Having sex with guys makes you gay. At least bisexual. And cheap. Just fork over the cash for some privacy, that way you won't be arrested by some rent a cop and the story won't be covered like three months after the fact.

Even after I defended Parry, she still had to go survey the newsroom to find out some bad things to say about me. Thanks Kate! Sometimes I wonder if my staff thinks I don't read my own paper. Hey folks, it's not my fault Singleton sued me! He's the one suing us, remember?

After we win this civil trial, we should almost counter-sue Singleton for damages. Parry's column is proof that the lawsuit has hurt our ability to make money. Also, it's not really helpful when your troops aren't behind you 100%. And it sounds like this lawsuit is really getting to the rank-and-file.

But whatever. That Bill Ward guy is right. You've got to put distractions behind you. That's why some friends and I are going to grab a drink at Biella after work and then spend some time on the water.

Dinner Table Debate

Last night my wife and I were arguing about work. She started calling Kate Parry names, and I told her to cut it out. Kate's no genius, but she's also not a "retard". Then my wife brought up the fact that I've called Singleton a retard on more than a few occasions. It's like I was still at the trial.

I said, look, honey, Kate and Singleton couldn't be any more apples and oranges. Apples and oranges. Singleton's more than a retard, he's like a grade-A douchebag. Everyone knows it. No one at the Pioneer Press even knows the guy because he's not around. And like my wife knows.